Change of attitude

In February my companion dog Cowboy passed away from Cushing's disease. I was devastated mentally I was depleted because I put so much effort into keeping him alive since November. Every day it was just a task just to get going and to add to it I was beginning to have my own health issues. I was extremely overweight my highest weight ever at 182. I felt bad I looked bad and then the stress of my dog dying just put me over the edge mentally. After he passed for 2 weeks I didn't even put on makeup or do my hair. People at work probably thought I was as crazy as I looked. Thank God we were wearing masks here at the hospital so no one could even see it. Slowly I began to pull myself together. I really lost my appetite after his death so fasting came pretty easy for me at that time so then I started thinking about maybe I could get another dog to ease the pain I felt. My husband said he prefer I wouldn't get a dog until I retired. Another loss for me, I was drowning mentally without a life vest every day was a trial. Just to basically bring it to light there's a lot of things in my life that I wasn't able to control. Losing my dog, not being able to get a replacement dog, not being able to retire cuz I wasn't of age. The highlight was there's something I can control, it's my health. I can get better I can feel better about me and I can feel better about the girl I was. I started listening to Dr Berg on YouTube. Many years my brother talked to me about eating sugar and processed foods and how flour isn't good for you. I actually kind of thought he was a nut. I avoided the subject because he was driving me crazy. At this point I was drowning and needed hope of a future for myself and the ability to control some portion of my life. As I listen to Dr. Berg I realized that what I put in my mouth was causing me to be depressed, overweight and robbing me of a future healthy life. As I gradually weaned myself off of the sugar and started eating healthier my outlook changed the loss of my dog will always be a sad painful time for me. But you know what I have a future I have a hope that I'm going to be able to get another dog and I'm going to be a different person. Actually, it kind of gave me a new lease on life. I'm happier and more stable. I don't have the mood swings or the cravings. God knows I'm not going to starve to death but yes I have lost weight and I feel great.